You can do this! I know that I wished I would have thrown out my husband years ago, I know now that I wasted a lot of time waiting for him to get it. I compromised when I shouldn't have. I let him cross boundaries that should not be crossed, and every time things eventually got worse. It did not do him any favors. I wish I would have been stronger and less selfish in the beginning, a lot of the reason I let him stay was money, but now I know that it is not worth it. I reread the posts last night and cried too, but after I felt better. It is not the hopeless cry of the past, it is a sad cry of feeling the sadness, dealing with it and moving on. I remember a ton of people telling me that I am such a strong woman when inside I was screaming "NO, I am not!" and knew that I was going to breakdown at any moment, but I did get through it and still am getting through it. I am strong and so are you, we CAN get through this. I am praying for you.
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.