by Tako » Thu Sep 02, 2010
Step 9 "Made direct amends to such people wherever possible except when to do so would injure them or others."
One of the lessons I learned in working this step (which is difficult for many to wrap their heads around early in recovery) is that we need to make amends to ourselves, too. In fact, many suggest that we put ourselves at the top of the list!
I was thinking about how I didn't really understand this step when I first heard it, but in time, I came to understand that I needed to respect myself and take good care of myself because I was the only one who would or could. I came to realize that I was not a victim, but rather a volunteer in the unhealthy relationships I found myself in: I realized that I had become addicted to chaos and drama. Staying and working my Nar-Anon program gave me the tools to stop reacting to all the negativity and to "choose my battles" and choose to act rather than react.
I call Nar-Anon a survival program because it saved my life and my sanity. When I look in the mirror now, I know who I'm looking at and to paraphrase Stuart Smalley, "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough and doggone it......"
Here's your affirmation! You are too!
Now, all you have to do is start believing it and don't let anyone treat you as if you aren't! Treat yourself the way you wish others would and be your own best friend!